But You're Still So Young: How Thirtysomethings Are Redefining Adulthood

But You're Still So Young: How Thirtysomethings Are Redefining Adulthood

From the author of Text Me When You Get Home, an investigation into what it means to be in your thirties, and to navigate some of the biggest milestones of adult life . . . and how it is more okay than ever to not have every box checked off

On Kayleen Schaefer's birthday she went dancing with friends, they broke a table, and she turned thirty standing on the sidewalk outside a club she got kicked out of.

Sociologists have identified the five markers of adulthood as: finishing school, leaving home, marriage, gaining financial independence, and having kids. But the signifiers of being in our thirties today are not the same--repeated economic upheaval, rising debt, decreasing marriage rates, fertility treatments, and a more open-minded society have all led to a shifting timeline. Americans are taking major life steps later, switching careers with unprecedented frequency, and exercising increased freedom and creativity in their decisions about how to shape their lives. So why are we measuring adulthood by the same metrics that were relied upon fifty years ago?

BUT YOU'RE STILL SO YOUNG is cleverly structured around these five major life events. For each milestone, the book highlights men and women from various backgrounds, from around the country, and delves into their experiences navigating an ever-changing financial landscape and evolving societal expectations. The thirtysomethings in this book envisioned their thirties differently than how they are actually living them. He thought he would be done with his degree, she thought she'd be married, they thought they'd be famous comedians, and everyone thought they would have more money.

Kayleen uses her smart narrative framing, research skills, and relatable voice and her own story to show how the thirties have changed from the cultural stereotypes around them, and how they are a radically different experience for Americans now than it was for any other generation. And as she and her sources show, not being able to do everything isn't a sign of a life gone wrong. Being open to going sideways or upside down or backward, means it has gone right: you found meaning and value in many different ways of living.

Title:But You're Still So Young: How Thirtysomethings Are Redefining Adulthood
ISBN:9781524744830
Format Type:

    But You're Still So Young: How Thirtysomethings Are Redefining Adulthood Reviews

  • Olive Fellows (abookolive)

    The twenties have undergone a rebrand. What was once a time when many people settled down and started a family is now a decade of self-discovery in which it’s okay to not be sure of what you want or...

  • Amanda Campbell

    As a thirty-something without a spouse or kids, this book was speaking directly to me. I appreciated the structure of having a chapter devoted to each of the five milestones that sociologists in the 1...

  • Jessica

    This book was affirming. It’s premise is based around the 1950s idea that there are five major milestones to adulthood: finishing school, leaving home, getting married, becoming financially independ...

  • Giuseppe D

    I think this book really resonated with me because as I got older, I had this nagging feeling of not being in the "right" place yet, of not being the person I thought I'd be at this age, of not having...

  • Allison

    When the publisher asked if I would be interested in reading But You're Still So Young, I was honestly a little hesitant because nonfiction is not my typical genre. But as a 32 year old female who has...

  • Andrea

    Too much time was spent on anecdotes and not enough facts and statistics, which would have added weight and gravitas to the author’s argument that adulthood is not what it “used” to be and that ...

  • Patrick Kelly

    But Your Still So Young By Kayleen Schaefer- [ ] Hiking Mt Morrow - [ ] I need to hear this - [ ] The 20’s are about finding yourself, the 30’s are about …- [ ] I did not find myself, I am still...

  • meowskinsbookskins

    But You're Still So Young: How Thirtysomethings Are Redefining Adulthood by Kayleen Schaefer was such a refreshing, validating and relatable read for me as I am getting ready to turn 35 years old next...

  • Althea

    I really need to stop reading books like this. Books about how your life progresses, your milestones, the decades of your life, whatever. They're not for me. This kind of book is for straight middle-c...

  • Genevieve Trono

    This was a fascinating look at the "rebranding" of being 30-something. Recently there has been a shift both in societal expectations as well as researched-based information that is now looking at this...